Smell my fingers! I imagine it smells like strawberries and cream…or piss and body odour.

This is great. Its exactly like the slideshow i made of what the hookers looked like in the yellow pages and what they looked like when I got them home and took them out of their wrappers. And no, wrappers doesn’t equal skin. Sick bastards.

One of the best things I have seen on Conan since Oldie died.

Wow. And to think that all these years I thought the worst thing Carl Lewis ever did was sing that horrible national anthem rendition…and put steroids in Ben Johnson’s water bottle! Christ, he looks like Mayday in A View to a Kill.

www.monsterpig.com — sadly it is not porn…yet.

Wait, midgets aren’t considered a breed of termite?

Uh…don’t girls try to avoid creeps? You know, like not paying money to call them. That has been my experience at least when I watch creeps hit on girls at the bars. I am not a creep though. You know how I know? Cause there is no fucking way a creep could own a van as sweet as mine! Plus, I love kittens.

Went to the MSTRKRFT show this weekend. They put on a great show but the Bank isnt a great venue for it for a number of reasons. 1) Dance floor was too small. 2) They put the smoking door just off the dance floor so anyone wanting to smoke had to push through the crowd. 3) The bar line-up goes into the dance floor. 4) There were douche bags there in suits.

Anyways, the music kicked ass and I guess that is more than we should expect in Edmonton.

Weeeeeeeeee!

I want to go to Africa about as bad as I want to go to an orgy in Haiti but I have to admit that seeing this in person would be pretty cool.